So this pregnancy had been quite the journey…..
I have had intense fear, worry and anxiety. I was detached, and terrified to let my walls down.
I had lost all hope in ever carrying a baby past 20 weeks.
I was at a bad doctors, and couldn’t get switched and things just felt hopeless all over again.
I was finally able to switch doctors to someone competent and the hope started building.
She referred me to a thyroid doctor at the first appointment. We got my thyroid on track and I have not had any issues.
My blood pressure has been good (it was high the last two pregnancies that ended in loss)
My thyroid levels were actually good.
Baby was growing right on cue.
Now I sit here 4 days from being induced because this little baby boy is so comfortable up in my ribs that he
has not dropped and I am showing no signs of labor at all.
Four days until I being the process of getting to see this blessed miracle face to face.
I am nervous to go into the hospital. I am nervous for the whole process.
The last two times I was in the hospital was to deliver still babies.
I guess I can be thankful it is a different hospital otherwise I would feel a lot more scared.
This will be good.
He will be good.
Pregnancy after a loss(es) is just a wild and scary journey. You never know if it will end up in another loss or not. You know it happened to you once, it can happen again at any point. You never really can just have a carefree pregnancy, can’t really feel safe until the baby is wrapped up and in your arms. Well in four days we will have ours in our arms. Four short days.
Here is the last ultrasound picture, it is hard to tell what it is but it is his face. Toward the middle of the picture is his nose…. oh he is just so cute and sweet already ❤